cat vomit

this week has been a wee bit unpleasant so i though the title should reflect that and i think since cat vomit is really foul so it's pretty fitting to me.

i am off lexapro and on zoloft now or sertraline, which is the generic. i don't have anything to report about it so far since i start it tonight but i will definitely talk about it once i start it. i'm just hoping for no horrible migraines or nausea.

my aztec man bust is now more for the most part. due to the crappiness of the art departments tables he is severely disfigured and currently decapitated. the table collapsed just as i was about to get him ready to store. it happened in slow motion and i stood there shocked for a moment before the cursing commenced. i was so loud that my professor came to see what had happened. i hope she remembers this incident when she grades my final one.....

in painting there's nothing to report other than i need to paint more~

i am still sickly. i don't know how this mega-cold thing found me but i really wish it would leave as my nose is raw from blowing my nose and my throat is tired of being sore. i don't feel as bad as wednesday but i'm still not 100%.

i can't wait to get off from work in an hour and forty minutes-ish. i'm ready to pester KidTerror, try a new hair treatment, and maybe have a drink to cap off the crap-tastic week.

since KidTerror let me know that he does indeed read this, i would like to say thank you. thank you for putting up with my crazy moods, cheering me up, and being the better half of us. i really don't know where i would be without you.

shuffling on back to less mushy things (mwah sweety), i am super pumped about the new hair treatment i'm going to try out. its just warm olive oil (or coconut oil if you can find it) applied to dry hair and left to set. since i spend a lot on hair treatments and products it would be awesome to find something so cheap that actually works. the reviews online are glowing (especially for coconut oil, some claim it stimulates new hair growth, doubtful but interesting) so i think it's a safe bet for me to try it. it even got good marks on the alternative hair forum i lurk in. so if it work i'll be sure to tell everyone i know, which means it will be talked about here tomorrow or sunday *tee hee*.

other weekend plans......i want to eat something really delicious and bad for me. i haven't decided what it will be but it's a definite goal. ummm what else, paint some, do some doll stuff, clean up the house a bit, play some castlevania symphony of the night, and try to get well. i think it looks like a full weekend.

off to trapeze about the internet some more before i get to go home~

******NOTE****** i just looked and this is my 27th post of the year.....huzzah that means it's special since 27 is my number, silly but i thought i'd share****************


feeling poopy

as the title says i've been feeling poopy lately.....at the moment i have a sore throat that i'm worried might be strep and despite having gone to the doctor for my mental issues no other drugs other than cold medicine are in my system....it's a shame because i NEED something....i had been prescribed lexapro and it disagreed with me in many ways and didn't do the trick so i'll be asking for something different when i go back in friday morning.

this semester i have been really proud of KidTerror and i. we have been going to class and keeping up with all our obligations and although it's tiring and means we are always busy it's nice to get things done for a change rather than be constantly stressing over things that could have been done on time.

i visited the family last weekend and had a good day out with my mammi and aunt mary. i also got to see my little sister, dad, and my step-mom. all in all it was a good weekend but it wasn't relaxing so i'm looking forward to this weekend so i can do some housework and catch up on some sleep.

art news.....my sculpture looks mayan or aztec-esque. it wasn't planned but evolved out of wanting a face with a strong nose. he's very different from the other sculpture so i think that will give me the edge when he's graded but that's if i can finish him this week. in painting i don't have anything special to report....i'm in a slump and don't really like what i'm doing but i bought some new canvases, acrylic glaze, and acrylic paint workable media that extends the drying time of the paint so i'll have to experiment with those. i'm hoping that i can feel inspired again once i get my health issues fixed.

oh more on sculpture, for my end project i kinda want to make a very large tongue. yes it's odd but i think it would be very amusing and fun to make. KidTerror got some interesting bubble wrap in with a package and the the texture just got my wheels turning. so either the tongue or a figure will be my end project, i haven't decided yet but i'm  eagerly anticipating it.

no dolls news to report, all my darlings have been sitting neglected as i go about my life but i'm sure i'll find some time for them this weekend.

big news (that i nearly forgot to mention), i'm going to A-KON 22 this year!!! it will be my third year to go and they are having my favorite visual kei band, D, play as well as an attached doll convention. once i knew all those details i had to go and i'm really excited for it.

that's all i have for now but i would like to share todays' motto: "Make today your bitch."

pretty sweet motto.....



i'm too sleepy to come up with a title. i suppose that's what happens with 8am classes and reading all of, "World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War." it was a valentines present from KidTerror and it was chosen very well, i suspect it took me around 5 hours of solid reading to finish it. i would have managed to accomplish this in one sitting had i been able to ignore all obligations but i'm pretty pleased the time it took me and how awesome the book turned out to be. most people would probably find it frightening and strange but i was fascinated with the realistic depiction of zombies. it was refreshing and very engaging. i'll definitely re-read it.

this past weekend was wonderfully spent with KidTerror and we remained fairly sequestered in our house which always makes the weekend more enjoyable. we had a valentines day early where i received a TON of chocolates and a hilarious and sweet card:

if you find the awesome nature of this card incomprehensible then by all means look up "hentai."

the card was and still is my favorite part about this valentines day because to me it says alot about KidTerror and why i love him. he's a quirky, funny, clever, and caring man that i feel privileged to have in my life. i know it's cheesy but i really think we have a 'forever love' and i look forward to experiencing it with him for as long as i can.

i also dyed some silk hankies, although i think i might need to dye more. any thoughts?

although they aren't really my colors i like the way they blend and it was fun to paint the hankies.

i love my grumpy dolls, too bad Panda's eyes were too wonky to photograph him....


what happened to being warm?

i miss being warm so much.....

i have random pictures to share!

some of the yarn i dyed with hope, i really like the bright colors. it reminds me of candy and spring.

some of that yarn in action, notice how a ssk is in the wrong spot, ugh.

my purse/catch all bag, i bought it around x-mas and i really love it.

Hazel's new outfit! I really like it and wish that i could find cute fabric like that (the fabric is imported from Japan, it has little alice in wonderland themed cards on it!)

a finished knit! it's just a simple garter stitch headband but i recently found out that it works well as a cowl or neck-warmer.

i also did some online shopping today and i bought some cute stuff. i bought four dresses from urban outfitters and i'm looking forward to them coming in the mail.

i would one-day like to have many everyday dresses in my wardrobe so it was pretty exciting to pick these few up. with this being said, it was a wee bit pricy but if the fit is good i won't be bothered by that.

other news.....i had a sit down talk about my engagement ring with KidTerror. while i think the ring is pretty i finally broke the news to him that i don't think it fits my personality or style. true to form, Kid Terror was very understanding and sweet about the whole thing! he's pretty much perfect to me and i was really happy to get that secret off my chest since it had been sitting there like a large cat since last june! as far as my ring style, i like antique rings and also like colored stones. i don't think that there should be any 'set' design or guidelines for an engagement ring. i'm just really happy that i can look for something that looks like me and my personality, fits my tiny finger (i didn't think it was little but i now know that 4.5 is indeed small), makes me happy when i see it, and reminds me how much i'm in love with KidTerror.....


pleasant sunday

i just got back from dropping hopey-dopey (my sister) back home and we had a pretty good day. we did some artsy stuff with watercolors:

dyed doll wigs and yarn:

oh and we may have irritated KidTerror just a bit.....


i named my flocke, hazel. i really love her and i'm surprised how bitchy she came out looking but that's what happens when i acquire a sculpt that everyone thinks is so sweet, i tend to turn it in an entirely different direction.



if there was a hell mine would consist of forever waiting to get off from work. that's what i'm currently doing right now and it sucks the big one. so i decided to blog to distract myself from the prospect of booze, knitting, and KidTerror, all lovely things that await me at home.

i really like my flocke. i don't know much about how i'm going to style her yet but so far i know, she won't be a pants-wearing girl. hair length and color as well as eye color are all up in the air as of now, as well as a name. i ramble on about my dolls too much....

my art paper is done, as of 11:02 this evening. it wasn't really hard to write but it seemed tedious since i thought that writing was more or less out of the question this semester. it is comforting to know that this is the only thing that i'll have to write though......

i'm ready to begin the weekend. my plans include cleaning my house, picking up my area (where i keep my dolls, books, art supplies, and knitting/crocheting supplies), watching a movie or two, finishing my knitted hat (no pattern to speak of, but i will post it when it's done), doing my taxes if i get my forms in, and possibly grabbing my sister and taking her out for a bit. it's all pretty dull but it's my plan and i'm pretty pleased with it. oh i also forgot to mention that i might dye some yarn and start some socks, but that's only if i feel super crafty.

i hope KidTerror and i don't get on each other's nerves this weekend...we've had 4 snow-days so we've been cooped up for a while. i enjoyed the snow days since i had a chance to catch up on my laundry but once the pipes in my kitchen froze i was pretty much over it. KidTerror enjoyed the time off from classes the whole time but i imagine it is awesome if you can keep yourself entertained. i lack that capacity at times so after i wasn't able to clean all i wanted i became pissed off....

i bought some silk hankies last night, and i am very excited about them. i have limited experience in different fibers so 100% silk is a pretty big thing for me. i'm looking forward to the sheen of the fiber and seeing how it takes dye. i may save them for a rainy day once i get them since i have a lot of other dyeing projects.

oh another note for this weekend, i get to paint flocke's face! i think once i do this a name will come naturally and then a rough idea of her personality, but until then she's just a blank canvas that i get to ponder about....


babies are false advertising

i hear a lot about people having babies and getting married and truthfully i'm glad i'm not there. KidTerror and i are engaged and committed but having babies is the last thing on my mind....babies are cute and all i suppose but to take on that responsibility at this point in my life fills me full of sheer terror.

i dunno where all that mess came from but it's probably inspired from all the stuff on fb. bleh babies.

it's the 3rd snow day and tomorrow will be the fourth.....i'm over it. not having water in my kitchen is maddening and i'm tired of being cold all the time.

i put the issac head up for sale, i feel bad about it since i was excited when i bought it but i have to remember that it was on impulse and once i remember that i don't feel bad anymore. i'm going to try and not stray from my dolly plans anymore since it never works out.

boring post.....i think i'll knit.


sculpture overload

meh i just got through writing the first part of a sculpture paper. what i thought to be just a simple copy-paste paper turned out to take much longer and be much more in depth. i'm not sure if i really learned anything new though....i don't consider myself an art scholar but many of the names of the artists and pieces were all too familiar. i noted that none of them were women but that was mostly due to the time period. meh.

snow days are sapping my energy. i'm not well equipped for the cold and neither is my house so it's been a bit of a trial to stay warm. the pipes in my kitchen are also frozen so cleaning the kitchen was out of the question. it made me intensely angry so i took that anger out on the laundry, which i am happy to report is nearly completed.

my ass-hat tendencies emerged again today but i've got the situation under control and i'm going to try and make an appointment tomorrow. i'm tired of friction between KidTerror and i due to the fact that i've pretty much become a basket case. i'm also tired of being constantly upset and not functioning the way i know i can. it basically time for a big change and although i'm apprehensive i'm ready to get the ball rolling so i can start feeling better and acting better to those around me ( i don't mean to be such an ass KidTerror)....

i put flocke together today and she is a cutie! she kicky as hell though, her arms are too tight and her legs are too loose. i'll try to fix that this weekend along with giving her a face-up. since she came together she has definitely beaten out the isaac girl that i brought home not too long ago. i feel like the isaac girl was an impulse purchase...eh i KNOW that the isaac girl was an impulse purchase....her eyes are way too big and even though she has a cute little smirk i don't think she's going to last.

it always sounds like i'm getting rid of dolls left and right all willy nilly but i don't see the point of keeping something like that around if it isn't exactly what i want. my boys, through some tweaking, have become exactly what i want them to be and i go by the rule that if a doll doesn't go with them then they have to go. it has alot to do with facial feature proportions. i never keep any doll that can wear a size 16mm eye and above. i like my dolls to be semi-realistic and eyes that large just aren't for me. i want my dolls to be more in the uncanny valley than to resembly anime characters. in case you weren't aware i'm very much over the small mouth, tiny nose, big eyes formula and happily so....

so i'm basically trying to say in my round-about way that i'm nearly certain that the isaac head will be leaving my house shortly on the way to someone that goes for the larger eyes. i know it makes me sound flakey but i don't care.

currently my doll line up goes:
DMK Aidan- Lucan
DMK MOMO tanned- Panda(monium)
DMK Flocke- unnamed but looking at winter themed names, to commemorated her icy arrival.

planned dolls include:
DMK Cecile (gitl)
DMK U-Jee (Panda's boyfriend)
DMK Pado tanned (boy)
DMK Paran tanned (Lucan's lady)

this would give me a total of seven doll which would not only satisfy my desire for an odd number of dolls but also cater to my intense love of the number seven. any more dolls would be too many and any less would just irritate me. i enjoy my doll hobby because it allows me to indulge in all of my little quirks and exert absolute control.

cecile, pado, paran, u-jee


"insert witty blog post title here"

tonight i feel pleasant, i just got talking to a dear friend of mine and i have another snow day to look forward to!

other exciting things, include the arrival of my flocke head. she's really cute and i can't wait to give her a face-up. i really hope she looks good with my boys. my other girl, ivy is already being debated, i bought her mostly for the body and the head isn't doing much for me the more i look at it. i can't shake the feeling that her head is too big in comparison to the heads of my boys, it may be the large eyes but it's irritating. i don't think flock will have that problem since she takes such small eyes, she wears 12mm/14mm eyes so she's similar to my boys. and it goes without saying that if a dolly doesn't mesh with my boys they have to go. i plan on letting ivy stay for a while longer to determine if she's a keeper so if i should send the head on its way.

i don't really have much more to report here. there was some family drama that pissed me off royally and just enforced my ideas about a certain member of my family but i rather not dwell on the unpleasant.

my bust is put together in art class. it wasn't really hard to get to this point but the process of preparing the clay was tiring. it's heavy and since my hands are small it take me a long time to work it so that it is ready to be formed. since the majority of that class is female, there were a lot of grumblings in that vein. everyone noted with disdain how shortly the males in the class got their clay ready and had their busts formed. but mine is ready to have eye-sockets installed, so i'm happy about that.

in my painting class i've been suffering from lack of inspiration. i think it comes from going to class and panicking when i look at my blank canvas. i also have problems with the lack of seclusion the class has but this was quickly remedied by installing myself in the corner, where i couldn't be approached unawares. sometimes preparing for that class feels like i'm getting ready to be hunted but that's my anxiety for ya.

i really need to take life drawing and drawing 2. i know i won't enjoy those classes as much as painting but i know that i with learn so much. i wish that i would have been able to build a stronger art foundation when i was younger. i had always been interested in art but never encouraged. i think i would be so much farther ahead than i am now.